I think we should maybe rename Father’s Day, Mother’s Day Two. This is the day when I get reminded over the pulpit, in Sunday School, and in Priesthood that I might be important, but my wife is far more important.

If I hear one more time that I’m the head of the household but my wife is the neck and wherever she turns, I have no choice but to go, I’ll puke.

If I contrast the nice flowers mothers got on Mother’s Day after sacrament meeting with the Hershey’s miniatures they’ll pass to the men, I’ll know my place. I’m a second-class citizen, or am I?

In priesthood meeting, I’ll probably hear how women are more spiritual and righteous than men. As evidence, they’ll point out the Relief Society’s better stats when it comes to visiting each other.

They’ll talk about the superiority of the task of raising children over going out and earning a living, as if earning a living precluded one from also getting credit for raising children. Today in church, women will get quite the elegant pedestal to stand on. So why do they call it Father’s Day?

Do we Mormons really think so highly of women? Or is all of this attention they get on a day that’s supposed to be about men some kind of massive consolation prize for not being ordained to the priesthood?

I’m not one to say that the leaders of the Church are wrong about who can be ordained to the priesthood. I don’t aspire to lead the Church. I’ve got confidence in the leaders we have.

It’s the culture that bugs me, the culture that reveals its embarassment about a doctrine regarding women and the priesthood by putting women on the proverbial feminist-hated pedestal. If the doctrine is true, and I have no reason to not believe it, then we just accept it and work within it. I think it’s disrespectful to women and to men to go all out for women on Mother’s Day and give a token nod to men on Father’s Day.

In no particular order.

• Even though the Church music manual says that postlude music should be played briskly, it will offend a lot of people’s sensibilities to do so. Many members of the Church equate “reverent” with “slow and steady.”
• If you are singing a solo, keep your hands to your sides and don’t draw any more attention to yourself than you have to.
• Do not slide in and out of notes unnecessarily unless you are a woman of a certain age, at which point you should slide to hit the correct note at all costs, disregarding rigid musical timing.
• The person choosing hymns should take care to only choose hymns the congregation knows. NEVER choose an unfamiliar hymn.
• While there is no clear direction that the conductor of music in sacrament meetings must be a sister, only call a man to the position if you can’t find a woman. A woman who is willing but has no idea how is better than a man who knows what he is doing.
• The chorister should take his or her (preferably her) time leading the music, allowing members to fully absorb each word, note and nuance. One should never rush through a song, even if marked as “lively”. There is a fine line between lively and raucous and as we have been taught, it is best to stay as far from The Line as possible (unless the leading stake or general priesthood leader seems to be pushing the tempo. Then, by all means, follow his lead).
• The organist must be careful to not play so well that it calls attention to herself but not so badly that people won’t listen and be reverent.
• Advise all soloists that it is important to not call too much attention to oneself. Music performed too well may create a feeling of pride in the one performing and envy in the congregation.
• On those extremely rare occasions that something other than a hymn is presented as a special musical number, make sure it is not anything once sung by Bette Midler.
• The congregation should never stand unless it is to give people a break from sitting or a national anthem.
]]> http://www.ohzion.com/?feed=rss2&p=14 1 http://www.ohzion.com/?p=7 http://www.ohzion.com/?p=7#comments Sun, 20 Jul 2008 19:15:03 +0000 Xavier http://www.ohzion.com/?p=7 It is our pleasure to introduce to you Sister Lily Dale, who has gracioiusly agreed to operate our advice column. Sister Dale has vast experience in all aspects of Latter-day Saint life and is unfailingly dedicated to the right and proper way of doing things. Visit her blog. Ask questions.
]]> http://www.ohzion.com/?feed=rss2&p=7 0 http://www.ohzion.com/?p=1 http://www.ohzion.com/?p=1#comments Sun, 20 Jul 2008 18:05:08 +0000 Xavier http://www.ohzion.com/?p=1 Welcome to Oh, Zion! This site is dedicated to the members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and the culture of the same.
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